The song, of course. It appears on Madonna’s newest album and I have been listening to the entire album a lot lately. Let me just first get out of the way that the concert was AMAZING. I wanted to go back Sunday night as well. Super good companionship and dance partners combined with a spectacle of acrobatics, music and attitude like only Madonna can express.

I’m noticing the Rebel Heart album has an underlying theme of what happens on a personal level when you get stepped on and what happens when people try to do it to you. The fusion between the feelings and the actions. And the struggle between the two.

I have been catching quite a bit of feedback lately. Everything ranging from “you need to be more of a bitch” to “you are not aggressive enough” to “you hold too much in”. Yeah, definitely a theme. I am still wrestling with a what to do with all this feedback. I wish I could say it was only from one source but it isn’t.

Truthfully, I don’t know what to do with this at the moment. I feel like I have worked very hard to be more open, emotionally aware and far less hiding behind walls. I don’t want to undo that work because it is important part of who I am. Then I wonder if I really have tilted too far into this sort of way of working through the world. I know that I work in a highly competitive environment. I have always liked the fact that I am far more about being tenacious than being visible and trumpeting loudly. Moving here was also a welcome break from that sort of expectation. Except now it seems that while I have definitely grown in directness, I have yet to reach the level of the local population. I think by aggressive they don’t mean gladiator sports but rather more Dutch.

So, this means that I have been gravitating to music lately that has lots of unapologetic bravado and maybe even a little dose of “fake it ’til you make it”. It is definitely pushing what I feel comfortable with for myself. I have no problem being an advocate for someone else and being fierce. And I am always encouraging others to ask for help and be aware of their strengths and have confidence in them. Uh, right, now I need to a little more of that for myself or I need to find myself a tough love coach to help me through it. I wonder if R’s old therapist has any extra room on his client schedule? 😉

Tomorrow I leave for a tropical island. It is only for a week but I am going to make the most of the 87 degree weather. I’m torn between deciding if I should try to learn dolphin training and go on a snorkel day trip or if I should be more frugal and do one or the other? I think I will make a decision when I get there, based on local input and the weather. I am only out of the Netherlands for 7 days in total so I need to maximize the chill out time 🙂

Of course, I am trying not to let the pets know I am leaving tomorrow yet George still had three seizures in a row this morning. I know, how does he know this stuff is going to happen?? The last one was a big one and I am starting to wonder if his medication isn’t able to control them as easily anymore. I hope not because I really don’t want to put him on something with more side effects. I can’t even say it was the banjo playing because I was making coffee when it happened.

By tomorrow, I will be saying “hello” from the beach 😉

Of course, I mean Madonna! Yesterday an email came with the final schedule and the funny disclaimer that said:

De tournee van Madonna is inmiddels begonnen met positieve reacties. Madonna heeft echter af en toe de gewoonte om niet op tijd te beginnen maar gelukkig doet ze wel altijd haar volledige show. Het kan zijn dat ze in Nederland ook wat later het podium op gaat en het concert niet voor 23.00 uur eindigt.

Which translates to: the tour of Madonna has started with positive reviews. Madonna really does have the habit of not starting on time but luckily she always performs her full show. It is possible that in the Netherlands that she will take the stage later and the concert may not end by 11pm.

So refreshingly practical 🙂 Basically, this tells me that we have plenty of time to have dinner before the concert and as long as we show up somewhere before the scheduled time that she is supposed to take the stage, we will be okay.

I am looking forward to going, especially since I have never seen her live. However, before then I still have to work. Tomorrow I have to go to Groningen for a customer meeting which means I will swing by Marum on the way back. Which means I am taking a break right now from working on my presentation. Sometimes, I need to do something else. I am going to go take the recycling out in a few minutes if writing doesn’t produce some fresh ideas 😉

Friday night I went to a banjo themed Wild West musical titled Bad Men From Bodie in Amsterdam Noord. I think I appreciated it more than most because it was over the top Americana. Sort of like a cheesy Western come to life. They will be giving it again later this month in one of the big theatres in the Centrum. I will be going again, I am trying to decide if I want to go on first Christmas day or second.

I missed the Thanksgiving dinner because I was at Homework Help too long. By the time I was finished Thursday, it had already been going on for 30 minutes. And you can’t just walk into a dinner 45 minutes late that is only two hours long. I came home and ate pea soup instead. Maybe next year 🙂

Saturday afternoon, Marianne and I spent a leisurely several hours at the Food Festival. Again long tables, good conversation and fun food options. Unfortunately, she had to go off to choir practice or we would have stayed there much longer!

Sunday, the weather was really terrible. Storm level winds and rain. Tram tracks were flooded. Despite the weather, I went to learn to salsa. Hahaha, that was fun and silly. Of course, you are supposed to count during it too, which is the exact opposite of what I am supposed to be doing with my banjo playing. I have a long way to go before I will dance salsa in public 😉 but I did learn three different steps and how to combine them!

Okay, this is not working to give me new ideas, time to take a walk around the block!